Today

Just realised it's Chirstmas Eve alr!! :D:D
I've always been looking forward eversince I was young to Christmas cos it's such a happy and special ocassion to celebrate :D
My tradition was to sit in front of the television and switch to Channel 5, watching the movies that were shown and admiring ppl singing carols in America :O
My parents also used to bring me to Orchard to see the beautiful lightings and decorations, taking photos of us in front of Christmas trees.
This is the past.
The present is different, no television, no movies, no celebration, no going out.
How boring is that. :/
I cant even go out with my friends and party till late night, for events like Christmas or New Year's Eve, only can sit by the tv and watch boring sg countdown while my friends watch taiwan countdown show/Korean drama (starhub cable).
I couldnt even find jobs/go job hunting with friends.
I cant even go out with friends.
I cant even buy the clothes/things that I like.
I dont even take money from you.
I dont even bother how I wear.
I look much more pathetic than others, yes, I grudge, but cant you see I'm trying my best to save money and not splurge like how others do.

Yes, I complain, I rebute, I'm not of any help to you cos I nvr did once do chores, I dont know how to cook meals and nvr learn, but is it my fault? I wanted to try but you nvr gave me a chance to.
I know I shouldnt be ranting and complaining cos the poor African kids do not even have enough food to eat. So why should I complain when I have a roof to live under, clothes to wear, food to eat. Cos we are living in a developed country where everything is competitive, be it studies, jobs or food. We have high living standards, so we will keep demand for more, that will NEVER END.

I always feel embarrassed, wearing the same clothes over and over again, and I cant even choose what I wear, do you think it's reasonable? -.-

Omg, I cant imagine how I jumped from one topic to another :/
I'm freaking tired alr... eyelids finally giving in.

P.S. I WANNA QUICKLY REACH 18 SO THAT I CAN DRINK
P.S.S I also admire those of my friends who get to drink secretly cos of the ppl ard them, lucky, I dont even have the chance to :/

Btw I think I walk too fast then my veins twisted again hais lucky still got medicine that was supposed to be for the other leg last time haha
okay I really half awake half sleep, gonna stop blogging, if not I'll be talking nonsense as I type all these.
Okay, maybe going cycling tmr, hope I can cycle by then and no more falls :/